< class="pagetitle">Archive for the “Media Bias” Category

© 2009 by The Conservative Muse

We’re “dumb” and we’re “stupid,” we’re “selfish” and “greedy;”

We won’t spare a dime to help those who’re needy.

If it weren’t for Rush Limbaugh we’d not have a clue

Of how we should think, much less know what to do.

These quotes all derive from the liberal litany

Of abuse once reserved for blonde airheads named Britney.

Of all of their insults there’s one that’s the basest:

Disagree with The One and it means you’re a racist!

Of course, all we Righties who dare to object

To Barack’s proposed health care reform can expect

To be ridiculed when, and wherever, libs gather -

But these days our TVs make us yearn for Dan Rather!

CBS axed Ol’ Dan for fake Bushie reporting,

But the folks at MSNBC are resorting

To more odious falsehoods to further their claims

That gun-totin’ racists are taking their aims

At earnest lib pols who just want to provide

Single-payer-type health care until we’ve all died.

In playing the race card, the network showed pics

Of rifles attached to the backs of white hicks.

What a frightening light these scenes cast on our nation:

Our black President stymied by white agitation.

Of course, there’s one fact these “reporters” held back:

That guy with the big, scary weapon?

He’s black.

Turns out he’s expressing his right to bear arms;

No reason to raise these malicious alarms.

But with Dan and the other lib media crew,

Propaganda prevails over what’s really true!

“Condescending” describes how the liberals preach,

But a lesson exists that the Right needs to teach:

The Left’s toleration of dissident speech

Goes almost as far as their “wee-wee” can reach! *

* – Don’t blame us; we’re just quoting the President!

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© 2008, by The Conservative Muse

 

It’s truly amazing how large is the trade

For product that’s quaintly called “marital aid.”

There’s movies and oils, sexy clothing, and such; 

These things make us blush, but we do know this much:

To get in the mood for erotic, hot fun,

There’s naught like a speech from Obama, The One.

 

It’ll cause a big thrill to run upside your leg; 

Your mind will be blown as you slobber and beg

To hear even more of his gifted oration;

Endorphins will gush in a flood of sensation!

You’ll hallucinate visions of Lincoln, and then, 

once you’re spent, you’ll demand it again and again!

 

This orgasmic reaction’s been finely portrayed

by NBC’s newsman Chris Matthews, who brayed

like Barack was so great the mere sound of His voice

convinced him The One was the optimal choice!

With stars in his eyes, and a cramp in his brain,

Chris pledged all his efforts to help with His reign!

 

Well gee, pardon us, but we always believed 

The job of a journalist wasn’t conceived

To run all the cheers for particular leaders

and sway the opinions of viewers or readers.

We guess we’re naïve in expressing the views

That newsmen should stick to reporting the news.

 

The Muse wouldn’t ever restrict one’s free speech

Or muzzle Chris Matthews’ annoying raw screech.

If MSNBC wants to go on and spew

Its orthodox liberal policy brew, 

At least they should say that they’re bidding adieu

To objective reporting – and principles, too!

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