Remember how lefty elitists all sneered
When conservatives spoke of how greatly they feared
The centralized planning Barack and his crowd
Would shove through the Congress, no protest allowed.
So let’s hop in our hybrid and take a short ride
To check out the depth of the coming Red Tide.
We’ll start in Chicago; ‘fore hitting the road,
We’ll stop for some cash from an ATM lode,
But our options are fewer since efforts were made
To impinge on the Bank of America’s trade.
Like the government dictated Fannie Mae’s terms,
It wants B of A to fund bankrupted firms!
A window and door manufacturing plant
Had gone belly up when, with income so scant,
their credit facility wasn’t extended.
For workers laid off, pols were acting offended!
By the time Rod Blagojevich jumped on the scene,
The “cause” was mere grist for their PR machine.
We continue on down to that blighted Detroit,
Whose winless pro football team’s near as adroit
As the vaunted Big Three, those old monoliths seeking
A ton of our money that leaves us critiquing
Just where it’s all going, and why in the hell
It’ll cause an increase in the cars that they sell.
The Dems are all focused on taking the wheel
From auto execs with the bailout (raw) deal.
Libs know the right cars that these guys should produce:
They’re small and they’re “green,” and they’ll run on the juice
From switchgrass or corn in a mixture that’s brewed
As alternative fuels to Arabian crude.
Our trip’s left us groggy and feeling quite gross;
We’re in Massachusetts in need of a dose
Of health care provided by state funded clinics.
We’ll wait for long hours with some fast-growing cynics,
Those patients to whom it’s abundantly clear:
That fabled Canadian health system’s here!
He’s not been sworn in, but Barack’s left a trace
Of collectivist thinking all over the place.
With Nancy and Barney and Chris and Sir Harry,
Its time for big government fans to be merry!
From dense inner city to isolate prairie,
Implications for personal freedoms are scary!